Keepin' it cool

Yesterday, I went dress shopping with my mother. I visited David's Bridal at The Mile because I used to work there are know many of the girls who still work there. When my friends asked me why I was visiting the bridal, I told them it was because I was engaged.

Some girls were like OMG OMG OMG and that was the part where I was supposed to jump and yell: "I am getting hitched, bitches!" But I didn't because, really, it just isn't me. One of the girls said to me: "You are so mellow!"And my girlfriend, Evelyn, said, "yea, she is always like this."

Don't get me wrong. I am happy and feel so blessed that I will soon marry the man I love. I feel extremely grateful and fulfilled. I simply don't let my excitement burst through my seams. You know how some people cross their fingers? My silence and containment is the equivalent of that. I like to keep the most important things in a safe place...sometimes, expressing too much excitement makes me uncomfortable.

Hell, my mother is going nuts giving orders and I'm simply sitting back and watching my wedding being created before my eyes. Perhaps I don't really mind because I have never had a set idea of what my wedding should be like. In a way, it's pretty exciting figuring out what style works for me. I've seen friends plan their weddings, yet I've never really imagined mine. It's not that I never imagined getting married. I have imagined it, but it's a totally different story when it becomes real. One thing is for sure...there are way too many things to think about. I don't mind sharing the thinking with mom--let's call her Chief Mother.

There are so many other things that come along with marriage. Apartment, furniture, organizing one's finances, paperwork--and that's the least of it. The precise shade of the linen simply isn't a priority for me right now. My aim is simple. I want to be with the man I love in the most intimate of ways: as husband and wife. If we can achieve that without losing our cool, that's a success. It also helps that Musaad is as cool as they come. His calmness calms me.

I am mellow. I am grateful to remain mellow as I plan my wedding. Why? Because I get to enjoy what matters most without letting bows and ruffles ruin my day. Chief Mother can take care of that.

The most important obstacles have already been overcome. My family is happy with my engagement and they accept my fiance. At first, I was afraid they would not accept my marriage to Musaad because of our different cultural backgrounds--he is born-Muslim from Kuwait and I am born-Christian from the U.S.  My mother once asked me if we understand each other well (due to our different "Englishes"). We really do. We talk about complicated things in simple ways--we laugh off the trivial things. There are many more similarities than differences between us. I mean, basics are always the basics, right? We are honest and loyal with one another. We respect each other's cultures. We compromise when we disagree. We comfort one another when we need it. My parents can see that--thank God.

This afternoon, my mother and I will look at venues. We are thinking about having a December wedding at a restaurant with only close family and friends. A nice, short celebration. This is what I want--simple, beautiful and joyful.

The planning begins today with momzilla. I mean, Chief Mother. If there is anything I have learned since my engagement, it is that Chief Mother is in charge. She frightens my fiance and I...but she's the Mother-of-the-Bride. Or whatever. I have to be gentle with her and let her call the shots--which is perfectly fine with me.